How To Instantly Kill A Conversation With A Potential Lead

by | Oct 28, 2019

What’s In It For Me?

Here’s Why You Are Still Struggling To Attract The Perfect People In Your Life.

The biggest mistake entrepreneurs make online while connecting to others is behaving in a way that feels like the world is spinning around them. (Especially and unfortunately often seen in the world of coaches.)

They send you their first message and straight up ask you to go watch their videos or go join their group, or simply send you a big elevator pitch kind of intro.

Or worst of all, they start sharing their posts and videos with you in private messages, tag you in their posts (alongside 100 other poor souls) and in general do everything that screams – “Look at me! I want something from you!”

If you ever, even unknowingly have been behaving that way, you must stop this nonsense immediately.

Yes, you possess the gift that can transform people’s lives.

Yes, you can be an exceptional person to follow or learn from.

But GOSH, that does not matter to anyone (except you) simply because everyone only truly cares about themselves.

Including you.
It is in human nature.

And therefore, a much wiser way to project yourself to the world and particularly online, even more so if you are hoping to attract some clients into your business or to get help from someone ahead of you is to MAKE IT ALL ABOUT THEM.

Every person you come across will put their needs above yours, so if you are acting in a “demanding attention” way, their first reaction is: what’s in it for me?

Even if you think you are just asking for a small favour or feedback and it is not a big deal, you are missing a huge point.

Before you can ask, you need to GIVE. Build relationships, acknowledge the real person behind the profile picture, or if you are reaching out to an expert, acknowledge that their time is valuable to you and you do not expect any favours.

First Impressions

The first impression you make with your message is crucial. You can forever repel someone who could have helped you or who could have become your client just by behaving in a very self-centred manner the very first time you spoke. That critical opportunity to really connect is exceptionally fragile. Studies by John Cacioppo, Ph.D. (Ohio State University) demonstrated that the brain reacts more strongly to stimuli it deems negative. Make that negative first impression – and lose them forever.

Stop destroying potential relationships and start embracing a better – much more GIVING approach.

Spend a few minutes chatting.
Pay a compliment.
See if there are more things in common than meets the eye. Make the other person feel special, particularly if you want anything from them, (especially any free advice if you are reaching out to an expert).

I promise this will get you much further – sometimes, even more than you could imagine.

This approach will stop the thought”what is in it for me?” crossing their mind. And opens the doors to something potentially very beautiful.

If you need support with content+connection on your visibility journey, let’s talk! Check out some of the ways I can guide you in the footer below.


Juliette Stapleton

Splenic Projector 1/3


Juliette Stapleton is a Visibility Strategist for coaches and experts. She teaches how to attract clients online, creating your OWN marketing experience that feels good, easy and aligned with who you are and brings results.

Juliette has been featured in Forbes and several major business and marketing podcasts, like SocialChatter, 365Driven, Rising Tide, iHeart Radio, and Confident Live. She is an active contributor to world-leading online publications, such as Influencive, Addicted2Success, Thrive Global, Good Men Project and many more.

She lives in Tallinn, Estonia.

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