How To Craft The Message That Sells For You – So You Don’t Have To

by | Jun 7, 2019

The biggest mistake of many struggling entrepreneurs is not connecting to what their ideal clients are struggling with. They tend to talk only about their solutions or programs. The sad part is that it only brings frustration and disappointment and zero sales. Let’s have a look at why this is happening and how to avoid it. In order to have a strong marketing message, it needs to speak clearly and directly address that annoying thing that your future clients can immediately relate to.


Let’s look at the psychology of this. People always care about their own problems much more than about anyone else’s. (Even if you are a people pleaser and may argue otherwise, this is only because you do not yet have healthy self-esteem at the moment. In fact, caring about yourself is a good thing. It is the foundation of authentically giving to others and that magical unconditional love to others. But this article is not about making you see that.) Since people always care more about filling their own needs, they are not receptive to anything you say unless they can genuinely feel that what you are describing is exactly what they are experiencing. It is the only way to interrupt the pattern of their thoughts, get their attention, and make your presence known to them.

It is all about how we feel. As humans, we are more focused on the negatives. It is a natural part of our makeup, with thousands of years of evolution and the need to survive in the cruel world of sickness, predators, and natural disasters. So when we hear about something painful we are dealing with, it activates our attention. It revisits that feeling of fear, overwhelm, insecurity, and uncertainty. It literally makes us relive the emotions associated with these feelings. And this is how we connect to the source of this experience – your story, what you are saying.


The main focus of your posts, your stories, or any time you talk about your business should be to highlight these painful feelings and assure your readers that you have the power to take them away. Forever. Only then can you talk about the solutions you have, but still not the programs just yet. Describing the delivery style for those solutions should be the very last stage of the conversation. In fact, I would recommend keeping those for sales pages or private communications where the conversion takes place.

In your content, your stories, your posts, and your interviews stick to the pains first and focus on the feeling of freedom from those problems that your solutions bring into your clients’ lives. Use case studies from your clients’ wins. And if you don’t have any yet, use the stories and examples from your own life. These are the experiences that made you an expert in what you are offering, aren’t they?


But what if you don’t actually know what pains and problems bother your ideal client? This is a dilemma a lot of business owners have when they start getting more visible online, even those who already have their businesses successful offline.

It is because they never had to really think and identify them to build their offline business. Often, our clientele starts with word-of-mouth marketing. My own business existed for five years on just referrals and long-term agreements before I started my online presence, and had to face the dilemma of not actually knowing particularly what my clients were struggling with.

Whether you have an offline business or are creating something new online, the best way to find out these details is by surveying either your existing customers or, if you have none, talking to people that fit into your ideal client profile. Don’t be shy to ask them to have a 15-minute zoom chat; just make sure you promise that you will not pitch them your services at the end of the call, and stick to the promise!


Sometimes, these calls can build a connection that later turns into conversions, but it is best not to have that agenda during the marketing research calls. The more people who seem to be a good fit you get to talk to, the more valuable information you can gather about the problems they are struggling with. You can put it all together in a fantastic offer that will sell easily, as it will be built on helping real people overcome real struggles; not on what you assume they need.

Assumptions are the enemy of successful marketing and especially when it comes to sales. While you are connecting to these people, make sure you take notes; write down the exact expressions they use to describe their situation now and also their vision of life if this problem was taken care of.

You can use those exact words in your copy and your videos and connect to people instantly, even if you think those words are entirely wrong and dumbing what you do down. Is that what you think is happening? Good! The simpler you can be in your communication with people online – the more conversions you will achieve!

Trust me. I am the Queen of Visibility.

 (As originally posted in Influencive. However since the ownership change that publication does not look as credible to me as before, so I am repostingit on my own blog.)


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Juliette Stapleton

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Juliette Stapleton is a Visibility Strategist for coaches and experts. She teaches how to attract clients online, creating your OWN marketing experience that feels good, easy and aligned with who you are and brings results.

Juliette has been featured in Forbes and several major business and marketing podcasts, like SocialChatter, 365Driven, Rising Tide, iHeart Radio, and Confident Live. She is an active contributor to world-leading online publications, such as Influencive, Addicted2Success, Thrive Global, Good Men Project and many more.

She lives in Tallinn, Estonia.

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