Are Projectors and Generators Compatible By Human Design
This is one of those topics that are so close to my heart, and gaining a deep awareness of the energetic interaction between these two types is very personal to me.
I want to begin this article with a disclaimer and a warning. It is my observation and deep belief based on my lived experience, as well as what the master teacher of the Human Design System, Ra Uru Hu always stressed, yet this is something that often goes unnoticed as people dive into the ocean of nuances that this intricate “science of differentiation” offers us. Human Design System is providing us with an energy flow blueprint based on your definition. Even the most compatible of flows are only just that – the energy flow and mechanics of how our auras interact, conditioning each other, soaking in that conditioning like sponges, compromising, dominating, bathing in our chemistry… (read more about connection themes and channels here [opens in new tab]).
But at the bottom line, it is not energetic compatibility that creates true magic in a relationship. It is the CORRECTNESS of each other FOR each other. And that can be determined only by following your Strategy and listening to your Authority.
I have recently been dating a few Pure Generators. Their big presence, the excitement, the not knowing where they end and I begin – energetically speaking. It is quite an experience… In fact, my latest romantic connection is a Pure Generator 3/5, (of course, he is, as all special people in my life are always 3/5… coincidence or karma? I am not sure, but I embrace it). We both entered this relationship following our Strategy and Authority. So, this connection gives me such a great insight into the mechanics of a Projector + Generator connection that is initially correct.
Whether it is the love of my life or simply a correct relationship for me to heal or learn something I do not know (and as a Splenic authority person, I should not really think about it, as my truth is only in the now, moment to moment). But I can already share some very obvious mechanical energy experiences.
I should mention that our Human Design connection theme is 7-2 Work To Do, so I cannot say it is a completely smooth ride in a couple of ways, but there is a Single definition that our connection chart forms and we both clearly experience in as a perfect sense of ease and peace whenever we are together. When we are apart, my Basic Small Split and his Triple Split definition create many more misunderstandings and complexities that completely dissolve the moment we are in each other’s auras.
Sometimes, he says that I am the Guide in our circumstantially complex relationship. So sweet, right? He does not know Human Design, and to use this word for me, a Projector, is pure magic! It tells me that he sees me and recognises me as a guide, putting him at ease with calm and clarity in whichever direction it is going. Whatever that direction is.
In an opposite scenario, in my business, I also once had to let go of a client, a Pure Generator. Something in our relationships reminded me of the same friction that surfaced with my mom (also an overpowering Pure Generator) at times, and this set me on a mission to shine some light on this topic.
So, if you are a Projector working or living with a Generator, you can understand what they expect. And if you are a Generator in relationships of any kind with a Projector, you can actually learn what Projectors are, so it will be much easier for you to accept and not get frustrated with them being who they are.
First of all, if you have been diving into Human Design, you will know that most sources say Generators and Projectors are the most compatible combination of Types. And it is true – but it is not guaranteed…
How the connection works: auras
Generators’ auras are massive. When they enter the room, you know it.
I know when the Generator in my space is either satisfied or frustrated almost instantly. It is a porous aura, easily “leaked’ from and into. This powerful auric field envelopes you like a big hug, as well as projects internal feelings outwards quite potently. I think Emotional Authority Generators are not always as “palpable” as sometimes they are distracted with their moods, but the Sacral ones I definitely feel very distinctly.
With that massive and quite open-to-penetration aura, Generators can also be a little confused with everything that comes at them, and they also tend to get overly excited and conditioned by other people’s chemistries. So making decisions for them is tricky indeed. They must ensure they are on their own for a bit, not to be affected by al these internal “intrusions”.
A Projector’s aura is the opposite – penetrating, focused, shaped like an ice cream cone. It is solid and precise, like a laser beam. A Projector sees what is going on and what is working. And that awareness is powerful, sometimes very hard to deal with – without expressing it.
Projectors’ aura focuses on the other’s G-center – and this is the centre of direction in life, a centre where Magnetic Monopole – a force that pulls together our personality and subconscious parts in our design (the black and the red sides on your chart). According to Human Design, our body and mind are connected by this Magnetic Monopole. As we travel on our life path, it allows the Design and Personality Consciousness to have a unique perspective. The projector’s aura can “see in”, sense and correct direction of the other.
So mechanically, the auras are “designed for each other.” A Projector intuitively picking up on some inconsistencies may ask a question or point out something that the Generator has not even considered before, and this leads to wonderful insights and breakthroughs. In return, they get charged by the Sacral force that leaks from the Generator when they accept this guidance.
Of course, this exchange can only work when a Generator is “prepared” – they invite the Projector to guide them and ask them for advice. This is the only case where a Projector’s advice can profoundly affect a Generator’s life. Otherwise, a Projector’s insight can be too heavy and meet much resistance.
Let’s have a look at the specifics of the two types of energies.
When following their Sacral responses, Generators have access to the life force energy. They are here to Respond to life on the outside – this is their Strategy. – which shows up physically in their bodies as an expansion, if it is a YES (and having the available energy for) or contraction if it is a NO. They are pumping whatever they are feeling (satisfaction or frustration) out into the world through their abundant and powerful Sacral centres.
The main features of their energy are:
- operability energy
- activity (even busy-ness)
What distinguishes Projector is:
- ability to give wise advice
So what Generators get out of this interaction is being energized by Projector’s competent leadership and/or guidance.
But what’s in it for a Projector? As a non-energy type, this access to Generator’s energy is very important and satisfying.
But here is a caveat in this interaction. The Projector will always be less of a giver in terms of action. They are not here to do much; they guide, and they rest. This is how Projectors are designed to operate.
The issue is that while enveloping a Projector, the Generator can feel that they are not enveloped back, and it feels like the Projector is taking more than it is giving. Yet, it is all a matter of understanding that the mechanics of the auras and energies are so difficult. The only way to have harmony for a Generator is to release any expectations of reciprocity and understand that they are dealing with a completely different “beast” here. I mean, this is the same as going out with someone with blue eyes but expecting a brown-hue gaze every time they look at each other. It is just not going to happen. It is in their DNA. Exactly the same way as the energy Type.
In this connection between the two types, it is the Generator who creates the connections and establishes these standards in a sense as well. They are the active ones in these relationships. They set the tone. But they need to invite the Projector in order for the correct relationships to form – invite to guide, and not try to influence them.
And for a Projector, the key is to be asked. To be invited before sharing that guidance. Otherwise, there is likely to be frustration. I know first hand how difficult it is for a Projector to let the other “drive” – set the tone and be active. I constantly struggle with taking the lead in my relationships with my Generator partner, and it is frankly painful to realize that it just does not work. Space and ability for them to lead is always bringing much better scenarios and opportunities. It FEELS better to wait to be invited, no matter how bad the need to lead and guide hurts! FACT!
However, Generators often do not feel rewarded in their relationships with Projectors. Despite being open, they feel taxed, paying the price without getting the rewards they expected. Attaching expectations is the worst curse of all Generator types, and it will always cause resistance and frustration – the sign of misalignment. But they cannot help if but to expect the Projector to be – ironically- just like a Generator.
This brings me to the painful story of my mom. I grew up quite close to her, and we had zero friction until much later, perhaps in my 30s. When I was a child, I lived with 2 Generators and a Manifesting Generator, constantly amplifying their energies, literally bouncing off the walls with energy (mom took me to a neurologist when I was 3 to see if this was normal). But at 27, I found myself living with 2 more Projectors (my daughter and my husband), and maybe this allowed me to be more of a “Projector” in the way I operated – there was not much to amplify there in terms of energies. Add to it a 1/3 profile, the most introspective and self-absorbed personality there is, and you get yourself a ticking bomb. I remember mom, who lived with us in Ireland at the time, helping with my baby, got very angry and blurted out, “You only care about yourself. I was always there for you, listening to you talking about your life as a kid, but you never gave back anything. You are so selfish.”
That really hurt. It took over a decade and discovering my Human Design to release the pain and forgive her and myself for this “misunderstanding” of each other’s energies and, with them – expectations attached. And now, my mom is in her 80s, and I can so clearly see into her – where she is holding back, where she lacks self-love, where she has this whole filing cabinet of expectations of “how it should be” and a lot of them attached to people and especially reciprocity. How hurt and frustrated she feels because “they did not reciprocate.”… Her frustration about being “wronged” by anyone close in her life – me included, of course. I still sense her deep-running sense of being rejected and not being heard…
Dear me, if only she knew HOW DEEPLY I see her, if only she was open to my advice. But she is not. When I tell her to live for herself a little (instead of bending backwards to accommodate anyone else – often without being asked), she takes it as another kick in the backside. It is in the way she quivers her mouth, and I feel her contracting energetically. It is so obvious to me. And yet my Generator sister seems to miss a lot of these hidden things and gets frustrated with mom in her own way – again expecting certain shoulds and holding on to grudges…
Recently, as I mentioned at the start, I had the same experience with one of the clients whom I had to let go of. I felt that there were a lot of expectations of reciprocity for their openness that I could not energetically fulfil. As a Projector, I feel exhausted by any expectations. I just wanted her to let me be. Plus, there was a real misunderstanding of friendliness (my natural trait) and friendship (which is a very special type of connection for me and never to be mixed with business).
The moment a client starts calling me or treating me as their personal friend (without me actually feeling that connection to them) is when I start feeling trapped in these relationships by our business commitments. Their energy is just too overpowering, and it feels like there is no escaping all their excitement when all I need is some space to rest and recharge.
Finally, another recent painful experience with a lovely otherwise Generator. His excitement about meeting me escalated into what felt like a landslide of projected expectations and assumptions based on just the top level of his understanding of the Generator/Projector aura interaction, disregarding the crucial factor: just because a Generator feels they SEE and RECOGNIZE a Projector does not mean their “invitation” is a correct one for that Projector. It does not also mean that they are entitled to be accepted as correct in entering these relationships.
It is up to the individual Projector to follow their Authority to decide if the invitation is correct for them, and the decision can also change over time, often quite quickly, as Generator’s aura and excitement can condition that Projector so much – it is hard even to hear your own Authority behind all that “sparkle”.
Again we have the mechanics issue here, where the Projector does not have clarity on where they end and the other starts. Projectors are open by their Design, and they are here to experience the conditioning. This gives them such a deep understanding of the other, but in these scenarios, it can often all go terribly wrong.
And a Generator may ask – if the compatibility by Design does not at least indicate a good connection, what good is Human Design at all?
Well, this would be such surface-level thinking… It does not matter what the compatibility by Design is. It does not take into consideration the conditioning of people involved, their cultural values, beliefs around relationships, personal space and communication, music tastes, for goodness sake.
The mechanics of our Design DO NOT MEAN that we are correct for each other. The correctness will be determined by the Authority of the individuals involved in making decisions on entering, nurturing or exiting the relationships. That is all.
Are Projectors – users?
Not at all. You see, when a Projector gives, they give from the bottom of their heart. They give it all, and they completely empty their energy reserves. Again, take my word for it, I dive into every correct invitation head first and emerge myself fully. And then I pay the price, in being completely exhausted…
I am absolutely dead after a couple of Zoom calls – especially with some Generators. I have to clear everything and literally “veg” on the couch all evening on a day of client calls. Forget going out, meeting people, or even doing something for myself. I have zero energy even to move. That is the way I am designed.
In fact – here is an article that will open in a new tab, so you can still finish mine. It is called “Projector Slavery,” and it is something every Projector AND Generator needs to know and understand. What can be an innocent, mundane act for a Generator becomes a nearly abusive influence from the Projector’s point of view. It is just something that holds so deep and grows more and more bitter about… being completely misunderstood by Generators in these scenarios – because they see in others what they enjoy themselves- energetic, noisy, high vibes, often deciding FOR the Projector what to do.
And the key word here is “energy reserve.” It is pretty shallow. If a Generator is an ocean connected to all water flow in the world (this is precisely true energetically as their Sacral has access to energy at any time) – then a Projector is a basin. And not a very sturdy one. It is easily cracked under the weight of the Sacral excitement and life force. This is as simple and as true as it gets.
How to make it work
If you are a Generator reading this, and you have been frustrated with a Projector in your life – re-read this last paragraph. If you are aware of what feels like a little bit of light action to you, maybe a full-on titanic ask for them (energetically speaking), you may be able to let go of the expectations. When they are with you, they give you their all – at the end of the day, they feel so sweet with you with all the energy you give. But that energy is borrowed, and they start crashing inside (you may not even realize how fast). They will be nice and pretend they can keep going – they genuinely like you. But at this stage, they need space alone so they can release the excess energy from your sacral that they consumed. It is like getting “Sacral drunk” and then immediately starting to experience a hangover.
I am laughing typing this because I do not drink alcohol often, and this is exactly what happens to me. I take one glass, nearly fall asleep, and then start getting grumpy and tired. I used to call myself a “party pooper” because I just shut down. A Projector’s life, my friends!
The relationships between a Generator and a Projector can be amazing when the awareness of each other’s operating system is in place. I am thoroully enjoying my current roamnce, even with all the complexities. And I believe that the reason I am able to see past those circumstances that make it complicated is my full awareness of what happens energetically between us. My understanding of the Human Design System in action.
And there is also one more thing that I personally feel is crucial. Projectors need to be seen and recognized to feel their alignment signature of SUCCESS. But they have to be recognized for a specific thing that they feel so fulfilled in. It is different for every Projector. The difficulty is that there could be people who see and recognize Projectors but not for what feels so good to be recognized for. It is like they are missing the point. And that feels so bitter, no matter how friendly and nice those people may be.
So, in terms of a Generator and Projector relationship, there could be this frustration about the lack of reciprocity of “openness” that we already discussed. But from the Projector’s side, there is this unbearable bitter burden of staying in a relationship in which she/he is not SEEN the way she/he would love to be.
If you are a Generator – treat the Projector in your life with respect for their need to be alone, NOT to be your go-to friend, allow them less participation, allow them to rest (from you), and allow them to be passive and not join in – this is not how their contribution should be measured.
And for goodness sake, let the Projector decide if they actually want to be your friend/partner and accept their decision without pushing the Projector to explain themselves just because you felt so much excitement at the start. It is what it is.
If you are working with a Projector guide, do not mistake their ability to see into you with friendship. Think about what they said that you found life-changing or the clarity and breakthroughs that they helped you achieve. That is their contribution. Appreciate them for that.
Projectors (a lot of them) generally can feel permanently exhausted (even when they do not look it) – keep that in mind and allow them to not be so open and giving as you are to them. What they give is so precious. Get yourself Generator-type friends for more active and engaged interaction. Love your Projectors need to be alone, to be within themselves if they have a self-absorbed personality profile. This knowledge of Human Design mechanics will give you both a beautiful relationship.
Or if you feel there is a pullback from a Projector in your life, let them retreat. Do not try to “hold on to them.” Do not ask them not to close in. Do not suffocate them with “being a friend when they need you”. Stop offering yourself.
If a Projector wants to leave, just let them – this is not a breakup… unless you continue pushing – and then it may be too much… Maybe you just do not make them feel SEEN the very specific way they need, and they find it so heartbreaking to continue relationships in which there is friendliness, but there is something missing for them.
If you are a Projector and you see a Generator getting frustrated with you, do not take it personally.
Ask if you could educate them about this energy exchange and that it has nothing to do with you not “liking” them or being selfish. You are giving it all, but the vessel is much smaller than they think. Yet, what you give is priceless. It can move them forward so far – it is just all about seeing the value of such reciprocity and knowing to measure it in different terms for each type.
So are they compatible after all that?
YES! But then, nobody is compatible by Type or Profile if we are truly honest about it. My second marriage was not that great on the Human Design compatibility scale – yet it was the closest, most wonderful, and most fulfilling experience I had for 19 years until death parted us. It is only when we enter specific connections following our Authority we can ensure they are correct for us. Not because we are a particular Type or Profile by Human Design.
So yes, Generators are most willing to follow the guidance of Projectors and will respond well to their guidance. It is not a problem to tell them what to do (in a constructive way, not a critical way). Through the Generator, the Projector is energized, and the Generator feels truly SEEN. This is beautiful chemistry, and with the awareness that I tried to bring with this article, these relationships have the potential to be truly perfect, provided both partners (clients, friends, family) follow their Strategy and Authority and operate correctly.
Splenic Projector 1/3
YOUR VISIBILITY GUIDE
Juliette Stapleton is a Visibility Strategist for coaches and experts. She teaches how to attract clients online, creating your OWN marketing experience that feels good, easy and aligned with who you are and brings results.
Juliette has been featured in Forbes and several major business and marketing podcasts, like SocialChatter, 365Driven, Rising Tide, iHeart Radio, and Confident Live. She is an active contributor to world-leading online publications, such as Entrepreneur.com Influencive, Addicted2Success, Thrive Global, Good Men Project and many more.
She lives in Tallinn, Estonia.